Dear Ugg Haters

Dear Ugg Haters of the world,

I used to be just like you. I looked at girls with Ugg boots on, and I mocked them mercilessly, pointing and laughing at the horrendous creature on their feet. I, however, saw the light. One day, my seventh grade friend urged me to try on her boot. "Just one foot," she said. I slid the boot on and DAMNIT! they touched my "sole" (haha, get it?) Anyway, that Christmas, I coveted my own pair of Ugg boots. Nothing crazy, just your standard short, chestnut, size 7 boots. I wore them almost every day. They went with every outfit. They weathered the snowy winter, and they kept my delicate feet extremely toasty. And you know what else? They're not even that ugly. Yes, compared to my gorgeous Ralph Lauren Vina boots, they're not the most attractive booties on the shelf, but on a scale of 1 to 10, they're about a 6, maybe even a 7. In fact, they often pull together many an outfit and save me from being late to class because I can't decide on what shoes to wear (the chestnut color goes with almost everything)

Furthermore, the Ugg boot is not a trend. If you think they're just a fad, a six year long fad at that (-___-), then look around come October and you'll see that the boots are right back where they belong: on every sensible girl's feet.

I'm tired of you people going on and on about your desire to see the Ugg boot gone forever. Suck it up. Buy a pair or shut up.

Au Revoir

Teenage Angst Travels

How does teenage angst travel?

One pensive and malcontent teenager becomes angry and/or sad with their life. She desires something else, something different. She could be happy, but instead she stews in that which does not please her or exist in her current life situation. She takes all that anger and all those pent up feelings and lets it ruminate in the depths of her soul. Oftentimes, she will discuss it with a friend, hoping to drag another vulnerable teenager into the infinite inferno that is ANGST. Anyway, the feelings of ANGST will rest in the soul of the teenager, sucking the spirit out of her. But eventually the ANGST bunny disappears. Where does the ANGST bunny go? Well I'm glad you asked; let me tell you.

The ANGST bunny remains within the soul of the teenager who created it until the teenager regurgitates all that ANGST onto another unsuspecting teenager (usually a confidante or close friend-those two don't always coincide). Every angst-y feeling must be told to the receiver. EVERY PIECE OF IT! There must be no filter or politesse about it. The ANGST bunny has to spill over into another soul, filling it up with all of its dark, dark bile. Then the originator of the ANGST is free. ANGST cannot be destroyed; one can only transfer its heavy weight into the soul of another adolescent.

(Side note: I am currently angst ridden, but as I haven't said why (and the internet is not a real person) I still have my ANGST bunny gnawing away at the life force that is my soul).

Au Revoir

South Park

I'm currently watching South Park, one of my favorite shows ever, and I got to thinking about which South Park episodes are my favorite. So I've compiled a list of my top five South Park episodes.

1. Ginger People

2. Butter's Bottom Bitch

3. Tsst

4. Woodland Critter Christmas

5. The Ring

Close Runner Up: Scott Tenerman Must Die

These are the South Park episodes I always return to. I watch them at least twice a month and I still laugh as if I've just seen them. Just though I'd share. :-)

www.southparkstudios.com

Recent Desires

Desires 1 by milanocookie featuring J Brand pants

Here is a list of my recent desires (mostly clothes):

1. J Brand Houlihan Skinny Stretch Cargo Pants: I just see them on my body. They're perfect. They graze the line of sexy and laid back. Too expensive for my current monetary sitution though. *shrug* life.

2. American Apparel Jacket: While it may not look like much in the picture (poo-poo on you AA model), I can see my self wearing this jacket. I love mixing preppy looks into my wardrobe. My friend once described my style as laid-back preppy with a touch too much of sexy. She's not lying; I'll probably pair this with a barely there shirt, really tight pants, or a short skirt sans leggings.

3. Orange-Red Lipstick: I already own this so technically it's not a desire, but I was lusting after it last week and I bought L'oreal Colour Riche Lipstick in Volcanic. I love it. It's bright. It's sexy. It's my precious. I even had the balls to wear it to school; it went over well. :-)

4. Zoe Saldana: I kind of want to be her. She is my current girl crush. I'll post about her (and my past girl crush Rachel Bilson) later.

5. Stylish Gray Sweatshirt: I'm really enjoying the sweats trend. It's super comfortable (obviously), and when done correctly, it can also be very sexy. Delightful.

6. Cool Bookbag for College: I'm not even gonna front...I want to look cool when I go to my new (undisclosed) college. I love this bag, and although it is overpriced and will probably not fit all of my books, I wantssss it.

Au Revoir.

Sade

Firstly,

I am NOT just noticing Sade coming back on the scene. I am simply taking the time to express my love for Sade.

I will not tell a lie, I was not always into Sade. My father was in love, I only liked "By Your Side." I didn't even like "Smooth Operator" (don't shoot me...it just wasn't and still isn't not for me). In any case, whatever element Sade added in the last nine years has made her music speak to my soul.

If you haven't checked out the album, listen to it. It's well worth it. The Robot Unicorn will rainbow attack you if you disagree :-)

Au Revoir.

Prom Dress Distress

Dear World of Fashion,

Please explain to me why I cannot find an open back dress in red or coral or peach or beige (either would be fine). No intense detail. Just well fitted. My dream dress would be Charlize Theron's orange Vera Wang dress, but I know that's not happening. If that dress in red or coral showed up at my door, I would b so excited. But seriously, the dress just needs to be simple and of gorgeous color. That's all I ask. Why won't you deliver world of fashion? If you don't, I'm going to show up to my prom in the nude or in something from American Apparel (one of those shiny numbers). Do you want that? WELL DO YOU? *audible sigh* I mean really...I kind of wish I had a large following so that they could suggest things. Oh well. I thought I was all set when I found my date, clearly I was sadly, sadly, mistaken.

Au Revoir.

MINE!

I can NOT deal with this.

Au Revoir

Lady Is a Vamp

So...

While I was lollygagging this delightful Tuesday night/Wednesday morning, I decided to apply WAY too much makeup then wash my face, pee, wash my hands, brush my teeth, etc. This is what happened:

First I tried to do some contouring. I highlighted my brow bones, cheek bones, and cupid's bow. Then, I used a dark brown (slightly grayish) eyeshadow to sculpt.

Then, I used my regular spring/summer blush and I was set.

I looked in the mirror expecting to look like a adorable distant cousin from Tyra Banks, but instead I looked like me (which is perfectly great and all-self esteem *high five*) trying way too hard.

So then I kept going, and I opened up black eyeshadow...downhill from there. BUT. I discovered the beauty of black lip gloss. I put on a clear lipgloss then topped it with black eyeshadow, and the results were not Draculastic; instead, it looked gorgeous (in some serious juxtaposition with the zombie I created on my face). So...try black lip gloss and see what you think!

My suggestion: YSL lipgloss in Black. OR if you don't want to spend 29 dineros on a slightly-old trend, do what I did and just use black eyeshadow, clear/sheer gloss, and some lip-smacking and rubbing.

Au Revoir.

Dear Usher...

Dear Usher,

Remember your cd "My Way" and how much of a classic album it is, with songs that make teenage girls and women alike quiver with the delight and imaginative thoughts for their lovers (real or made-up). Ok...Good. Now stop making not-so-good albums at lightning speed, go back to your roots, stop trying to keep up with the "youngbloods", and do what you do best. Please. For the sake of female fantisizers everywhere. Fantasizing about your crush just isn't the same with "Love in This Club" in the background. I will wait. Trust me.

Your (questioning) Fan,

Milana.

Au Revoir.

*Sob*

I wish I dressed like this.

I need a varsity jacket. I've always wanted one.

Those shoes. I don't know if I think they're ugly, but I want them. It's like that boy that you like but you don't want to say because your friends will tell you that he is not attractive...but you really want him in los pantolones.

I also want white shorts (but those are rather attainable)

i wish... by milanocookie featuring ASH shoes

Stupidity: An Unexpected Blessing

Here is a conversation that I had with one of my favorite friends:

"friend" will remain "friend" until I have permission to post his name.

Milana: euro makes me question religion i HATE it

Friend: LMAO

Friend: comp religion makes me question religion

Friend: haha

Milana: intelligence is depressing

Milana: mediocre ppl must b really happy

Friend: truer words were never spoken

Milana: can u imagine just not questioning the world around u

Milana: ??

Friend: no

Milana: do u kno how happy u would b

Friend: i can not

Milana: not contemplating life after death

Milana: the meaning of life

Milana: purpose

Milana: whether god exists

Milana: if religion isnt merely a construct used to justify & separate. who is rite?

Friend: just living

Milana: nd who will spend their days burning in a manmade hell??

Friend: wud be amazing

Friend: poetry much milli b?

Milana: hahah gracias

Think about it.

Au Revoir

Hot Peas & Butter Baby Come & Get Your Supper

I love lyrics like this (and in the song below). Granted these are 90s songs, but for some reason women still aren't owning their sexuality. I love it when women are aggressive with their sexuality. As it's seen in literature, there is a direct connection between sex and power, and as long as women allow themselves to be the submissive ones in sexual relations, we will never gain true equality. Every time a man is turned off by a woman who approaches him, every time a girl is labeled a whore (by both males & females) after deciding she'd rather have multiple sex partners than find her one true love, inequality, however subtly, rears its ugly head.

I'm very serious about the notion of sexuality & power. When I can explain it more fluidly, I will do so. But for now, just think on it.

There's something beautiful & fresh about a woman just being comfortable and confident and possessive with and of her sexuality. It's potent. It's sexy (for lack of a better word).

Don't Know How You Do the Voodoo that You Do.

She Makes Me Want to Grab a Noose...

Originally I was going to post about my favorite model Chanel Iman, but then I realized that everybody and their momma loves her, so I figured I would exhibit the amazeballs-ness of another gorgeous woman who makes me want to grab a noose and say goodbye world (because she's so beautiful and creative and entertaining).

She's not a model (though she might as well be).

VASHTIE KOLA.

I stumbled upon this gem while reading Nylon. Not only is she gorgeous, she's extremely talented (she directed the Us Placers video-which you can watch in an earlier post), and like me, she's obsessed with 90s music. Vashtie is an aspiring music video director. She owns her own clothing company, Violette, which has adorable tee-shirts and tanks that are perfectly loosely fitted and perfectly overpriced (but that's ok). She has an extremely cool life, that puts my daily listening to music, while reading & drinking tea to shame, and a kitten named Vladimir. oh yea, and she used to date pharrell. check her out.

Au Revoir.

Oh Barb...

Barbara Henrickson is a character on one of my favorite shows Big Love. If you haven't seen the bus posters, or the commercials, or the emmy they won, then I'll tell you. Big Love is a show about polygamists living in Utah. My favorite character, though she continues to disappoint, is Barb. I, however, HATE Bill, the patriarch of the family. I get it. Bill has vision. Bill is great. But sometimes, Bill pushes too hard. He has asked Barb to give up so much: her monogamous marriage (they were originally monogamous christians then all of a sudden he was like OH WAIT i want to have two more wives -__-), her family, her mother's love, her religion, her job, the list never stops. He makes her compromise her morals. He chastises her. All for his vision. There are times when I see the fire burn within Barb, and she has moments where she leaves, but she always comes back. WHY!?? I never want Barb to leave the show, but at the same time, just once, I would like to see her stick to her guns and tell Bill "no." Just one time. Why does Bill continue to act out? Because she will always come back, and frankly...that is BS! Barb get it together. Leave Bill or fix the relationship. Do something. Because you are disappointing me. Your biggest fan. By the way, this is not just for Barb.

Words don't mean much of anything. ACT. Barb, ACT. Random reader, ACT. Boy who feigns interest in my blog so that he can get in los pantolones, ACT (though you might get denied).

Acid Trip for the Kids: BOOBAH!

I CAN'T HANDLE THIS:

SUMMER! ?

neutral draping by milanocookie featuring Bottega Veneta tops

Items in this set:
Jersey racerback tank, $260
Drape Motor Vest, $675
Siwy Denim Shorts, 220 EUR
Cocobelle Flat Class Shell Sandals in Beige, $39
Night suede shoulder bag, $275

I know I can only afford the sandals...A girl can dream of summer & expensive clothes.

Au Revoir.

Ou Est CRS??

C.R.S. Child Rebel Soldier. The super group: Kanye West, Pharrell & Lupe Fiasco.

WHERE IS THE MUSIC FROM THIS GROUP??????

I have been patiently waiting since hearing "US Placers" (which came out in 2007 fyi) a while back, but this is absolutely ridiculous. After all this waiting, whatever they produce had better be on some next shit.

Nevertheless, here are the only two tracks available (to my knowledge) :

CRS makes Godot look timely. (10 points for Gryffindor if you know the literary reference. 10 more if you know what show I stole this joke from)

Au Revoir.

The Value of the V

I have an issue with our society. Why do we put so much value in a woman's virginity or sexual virtue? I get it. Throughout the years woman have been taught to attach emotion to our sexual activities, but seriously, why? Sex is sex is sex is sex is sex. I admit that I'm sure emotional sex means so much more than a random hookup, but that doesn't mean we can't have both. And if we do decide to have both, we should all respect the choices made by others (unless the woman in question is having sex to feel pretty)

Right. SO sexual virtue. I'm not saying that it's meaningless, but our society NEEDS to stop teaching girls that their value lies between their legs. If I wanted to have sex on a first date, the most it should say is that I felt an extremely intense attraction that I couldn't ignore. The end. I am still interesting. I am still funny (sort of). I am still intelligent. I am still pretty. I am still strange and adorably awkward. I am still many, many things that a man could be attracted to and possibly fall in love with. Sex is sex is sex is sex. At the end of the day...it is a hole. My value is not within a hole. My value is within my personality.

So, some might say that despite this truth, men will still look down upon a girl who has sex on the first date (I refuse to say "gives it up" that would suggest that I submitted to some man's desire, when I am simply indulging my own). And for every man that would look down upon me if I were to have sex early on in the relationship, well "see you later. big ups to all my haters!" I could honestly do without you, and you are the type of man that I would never commit myself to.

Au Revoir.

P.S. That wasn't very eloquent, but this is my stream of consciousness and not that of a Faulkner or Woolf character.

Blast From the Past

Hey. Remember this classy lady?? This is Aaliyah, and I just (as in since like a month ago) fell back in love with her. I don't exactly remember what she was like, but when she died there was a lot of "fallen angel" talk. In any case, I miss her music, and when I listen to her songs these days I tend to think about what she would be like now. She transformed with her third cd "Aaliyah," but if she were still alive I think she would've continued to morph and surpass the likes of the Bey (beyonce). If you weren't aware of her, check her out and don't blame me if you frown because your desire to hear more goes unfulfilled. Here are some of my favorite Aaliyah tracks:

1. Are You That Somebody

2. Don't Know What to Tell Ya

3. Extra Smooth

4. One in a Million

5. A Girl Like You

6. If Your Girl Only Knew

Au Revoir.

5 Songs I Am Currently Bumping

1. Don't Stop- Brazilian Girls

Literally got into this an hour ago. I love it. The lyrics are obvious & provocative & sexy.

It makes me want to get up and dance like a high white girl. I love it.

2. Pussy- Clipse

The title is vulgar. Nevertheless, the song is delish. Don't be a pussy, check it out.

3. One Day You'll Be Mine- Usher

This makes me wish that I had a boyfriend. This song reminds me why I hate the new Usher. Old Usher's voice is smooth. Old Usher is sexy. Old Usher makes me wish I were a 90s teenager in love.

4. As We Enter - Nas & Damian Marley

The beat is hot. Nas is Nas (if you don't know what I mean, leave my blog and never come

back). The verses are a delight & are in perfect harmony with the beat. Nas says:

"and (pronounced like Anne) frankly speaking" get it? Anne Frank. (he probably has no idea that he is doing this) No matter, I like it.

5. First Date Sex- Mike Posner

Alright. His voice is odd. It's not crazy clever. But for some reason, it makes me laugh.

"So take off your Ugg boots and let me hit it" Nuff said. Bump it. Delete it in a few days.

Au revoir.

Oh, hey...

Well, because I am avoiding studying and such, because I'm told that I should blog, because I prowl the net like a bandit, because I have an intense opinion about many things, because I have obsessions with music & beauty that need to be sublimated, and because I love hopping on a bandwagon (especially, after I kind of started that whole xanga thing at my school in middle school, nbd) I decided to make a blog. So...like it. Oh and just housecleaning (though no one will read this save for bored friends & boys feigning interest in order to get in los pantalones):

-Actually, no housecleaning, just wanted to say that thing about friends & boys.

Au revoir.